This isn't the ''"Robin Hood"'' tale you remember from your childhood. But if you search far enough back through the generations, you might be able to find an ancestor to whom this story made sense. There was no robbing from the rich to give to the poor; and the only pillaging was done by the French. In fact, this film could be better described as the precursor perhaps to the tale we all know and love of the outlaw in green tights. I hate writing film reviews because I don't like to give away details, but frankly, I don't know if there's much to give away. '''Russell Crowe''' is a better than average actor (even if he can’t crack a smile or really make more facial expressions than Zoolander) and I’ll even say he did a better job than Kevin Costner. Unfortunately, he was cast into a role made for ''Gladiator's'' Russell Crowe but Robin Hood's part wasn't written as such. And this leads me quickly into the movie's biggest flaw. Clocking in at a good two and a half hours, you would hope for more than two hours of slowly building plot with only scatterings of humor and action until the end. You would think in those two hours, they could at least develop the characters, but even Crowe's lead character barely grows. He goes from a man fighting with Brits against the French in France to a man fighting with Brits against the French in England. There is some minor soul-searching along the way, but that little bit was practically stolen out of A Knight’s Tale. Heck, the entire movie would probably be best described as taking the best parts from ''"Gladiator"'' and ''"A Knights Tale"'', making them mediocre and then throwing in some ''"Peter Pan"'' and some extraneous plot. Like I said, the film's biggest problem was the lack of character development. Aside from Robin (who is actually Robin Longstride in the guise of the deceased Robin of Loxley), you have Marian, but she's far from the pretty, single maid you'd expect. Amazingly, their romance grew incredibly strong despite hardly any interaction. The Merry Men were there...or were they? Little John and Co. were some of the best characters in the movie and certainly provided some comic relief, but they seemed only to be around when it was time for a fight or a drink. (On a somewhat related note, '''Mark Addy''' as Friar Tuck was an amazing choice, but again, they offered so little of him to the audience...and yes, he was in A Knight's Tale.) In addition to the Robin's entourage, Peter Pan's “lost boys” showed up a little here and there. Apparently, all the children of Nottingham had run away to fend for themselves as their own little tribe in Sherwood Forest. Lastly, there's Prince/King John - whose character can't decide whether to be a naïve, power-hungry, royal pain in the... or a naïve, troubled, little child. As the latter, he provided some laughs; as the former, well...picture a grown male version of Veruca Salt from Willy Wonka with a terrible goatee. I wish I could give better descriptions of the character, but as I think I've already made abundantly clear, this is pretty much all the information you are given. I had high expectations of this movie, but I was definitely let down. I spent the entire car ride home trying to think of some positive things to say and I did finally figure out a couple: -It could have been worse - at least there were English accents and no Kevin Costner; -The plot, though slow-to-build, was certainly a least a little bit intriguing; -The attempt to combine several centuries of English history into maybe a month at least got one fact straight: the French can't fight wars. I'm almost hoping that they do produce a sequel to this with the intent of actually showing the tale of Robin Hood one would expect and desire to see, but I would encourage everyone to wait until then and pass on this flick. Go watch Disney's animated version or Mel Brooks' hilarious parody (''"Men in Tights"''). Otherwise, this is just another awful remake of a classic. [[font|size=1]]...And speaking of awful remakes of classics, there was a preview for a remake of THE ''"Karate Kid"'' starring Jackie Chan. Ralph Macchio (who was born & raised in my hometown) must be furious.[[end-font]]